Mailbox

I like to think that life works in a funny way. It allows you to sink and drown as it greets you with magical under-water experience. I’m finally getting some time off work. Actually, getting some time off everything. Off to Rio tomorrow as a prize for all the hard work and sacrifice. Drama, drama drama. But indeed, off to Rio. All I needed was some time to rest and to relax. I guess I won’t be posting anything until Monday, but at least you’ll know why. This morning I was reading some old e-mails. Some of them, I didn’t even remember. It was interesting to relive some situations and “refeel” some feelings. Well, as far as I’m concerned, there is nothing wrong in doing that sometimes. It feels good to remember and cherish old memories. It feels good bringing back to life people who dwell in your past. It’s something you do within yourself, a secret you hide. Nobody has to know what you think, what you feel and even who you think about. Every now and then, you remember, you hold it close to yourself and you close your eyes so that it doesn’t give you away. Every now and then, you listen to a certain song, or songs, and you hide your love away. You have to…You spend months and years of your life without those memories, but never a day. Never a day goes by that you don’t think about it. Never a day goes by that you don’t feel it. Never a day goes by that you don’t long to bring that, him, her, back into your life. Just for a moment, just so you can settle for what’s best, just so you can choose. Simply tired of letting life make your decisions. I know I am. Anyway, take some time off and read your old e-mails. It’ll make you feel good, safe, comfortable, but also, miserable. And you know what? It’s ok. It’s ok to feel miserable at times. As long as it’s for a good cause – a good memory, a good person, a good e-mail. You’re allowed and bound to let moments and people die, just like they do inside your mailbox. The thing is, in life you can’t always rescue it. In real life, usually, if you let it go, you either forget about it or you regret it. And it can get worse: realizing everything you let pass by when it’s just too late to even think about it. But don’t worry: when you drown, life will certainly give you enough breath to live your magical under-water experience. And maybe, that experience, is exactly the one you let go years back. “If you love something, set it free. If it doesn’t come back to you, it was never yours to begin with” – and you usually know. I know I do.

Going to Rio will certainly be somewhat interesting and relaxing. A trip to get my thoughts off work or anything that may be troubling me. I'd rather think it's just like any other trip. Just like any other place. I just wonder, deep inside, if there is anywhere else in the world I’d rather be. And still today, i'm guessing no.